General

My conclusion

For reference, the other post is here: fantasyfeeder.com/forum/posts

Maybe you have unreasonable expectations, or ask for too much? I can't be sure but I kind of have that impression.

I did see your other post, and wow, just wow. To be clear, you do have the right to state any preferences and non-negotiable requirements you want. But the longer or more stringent the requirements, the shorter the potential list is. You also have to consider that not everyone who does in fact fulfill the list of requirements and most preferences, will be interested. You also framed your requests in such a way that you'd spend virtually nothing, while the potential suitor has to spend a lot on something very risky.

I also think that maybe you're being impatient? You posted this, less than a day after you posted your other post. Even if there is someone who might be willing to do what you ask, what makes you think that someone will jump in right away?

As a man, I already know that I'm pretty sure I will not even remotely consider the mail order/long distance bride thing for a LOT of reasons, and these are reasons why someone who might consider it, may still be reluctant anyway.

- Catfish / scammers, a common problem with mail-order/overseas/across International borders. But we'll assume that doesn't apply to you.

- What expectation is there, that you'd even get along, much less actually enjoy each other's company?

You just can't be sure. For the same money as the plane ticket, I can go to the bar multiple times and talk to random women there. Even if they all turn out to be a bust, that's okay. I still got good drinks, live music, and talk about whatever silly thing with the regulars there.

- I must also emphasize, that online v. in-person interaction is very, very different. The cost to make an in-person interaction has been made far too high.

This is coming from someone who has been on the Internet for a very long time, and over the years, there are some individuals I first spoke to this way, that I might be willing to meet in person. However, this process took many years and was by no means guaranteed. Oftentimes, meeting someone in person is nothing like the online interaction.


Realistically, I'm unlikely to consider driving more than 2 hours one way, and I really want something within about an hour or so. Money, and especially time flexibility makes this a challenge. But even if I was compelled to travel so far, I'd make arrangements to travel there in person, with the expectation that she will do the same, including paying for whatever transportation arrangements she uses out of her own dime. Much in the same way that with someone local, I expect she'd regularly make the drive to my place, and do so on her own time and dime.

My advice is to either try to find someone local, or if you really do wish to leave El Salvador, to hold off on looking for a relationship until you do so. And, you're 21 years old.. you still have plenty of time.

Also, this post is not a Personals Ad, so I'm moving this to General.
2 years

My conclusion

If you're telling the truth, then I'm sorry to hear that because that's horrible. It was not my intent to belittle your situation, and I hope you can get out of somehow. You're absolutely right that I don't know your situation, or the circumstances that led to it. I was however, offering a perspective of what others may be thinking.

The broader point I was making is that trust is quite difficult to establish and it doesn't happen overnight, and I listed possible reasons why others may be slow to trust.
2 years

My conclusion

ILuvChubbyChix:
If you're telling the truth, then I'm sorry to hear that because that's horrible. It was not my intent to belittle your situation, and I hope you can get out of somehow. You're absolutely right that I don't know your situation, or the circumstances that led to it. I was however, offering a perspective of what others may be thinking.

The broader point I was making is that trust is quite difficult to establish and it doesn't happen overnight, and I listed possible reasons why others may be slow to trust.

SeijiDarling:
I know it doesn't happen overnight but today I was having self ending thoughts so another comment saying I'm asking to much or that I'm not worth that much really doesn't help me.


So, speaking as a person who have been through some mess, this is not the way to get what you need. Best case senario, you get ignored. Worst case senario, you get into a situation that you don't need to be in.

Also, why was a 14 year old allowed to fly out to another country to meet her BF? Why didn't your parents stop you? Have you contacted the counsulate? Why were you, a minor, sent away from your native country?
2 years

My conclusion

I'll try to rephrase. I hope you get free of your situation and find the guy you're looking for. You deserve a break. The kind of guys you want are out there for sure. However, they're actually pretty rare. Like exceedingly rare, probably less than 1 in a million. Those kind of guys know how valuable they are too, so they're very picky about who they spend time with, since they have their pick from lots of interested women. That also makes them extremely cautious about people who want to take advantage of them, so they are guarded against everybody. The type of ad you made sounds enticing, but would raise too many red flags. Maybe you should change your approach. Try contacting people directly so you can build trust first before laying out your situation. Also, most people have to search for years before finding mr. right, so maybe try to find an alternative means of escape on your own. Personally, I'd be very interested, but I'll just have to keep you in mind in case I ever make over 6 figures someday, lol. Good luck
2 years